The world we live in leads us to believe that we have a lot of power over our destiny once we decide what we want. Mood boards and meditation and visualizing have all enforced the belief that we call the shots and determine our story–and I think sometimes we approach prayer that way, too. We think we know what we want and how to get it, and we ask God to give it to us.

God can I have a baby? Yes or no.

God am I called to be married? Yes or no.

God should I take this job? Yes or no.

Mary’s “yes” to God’s call to be the mother of Christ has so many powerful layers, but the one that resonates with me again and again is not what she said yes to, but that she was ready to say yes at all. Mary probably didn’t grow up asking God if He could one day choose her to carry Christ if He decided to take on human flesh. But when the time came for her to accept this mission, she was still ready. Her plan wasn’t to raise the Christ child. Her plan was to say yes to whatever God asked of her.

In our own lives, do we follow Mary’s example when saying yes? Or do we only say yes to the ideas and desires we have already planned for ourselves? It’s easy to put God into a genie lamp that we rub when we are ready to hear the yes we’ve been waiting for, and then say it was our calling all long. This tricks us into believing that God says yes to us.

But in order to live our mission, we are the ones who must say yes to Him.

Mary exemplified this so well. Even without knowing the specifics of what God was going to ask of her, Mary lived her life cultivating a willing spirit, so that when she heard God ask something of her, she would recognize His voice and say yes to whatever He asked.

This is what we are meant to do as well! In fact, Mary tells us what is required of us at the occasion of Jesus’s first miracle. She turns to the other men and says, “Do whatever He tells you.” Mary doesn’t say, “Ask Him what He wants, then decide if you are willing or able to help.” By giving us a clear direction to do whatever He tells us, Mary invites each of us to say yes to whatever Jesus asks.

Saying yes fully means saying no fully, too.

It’s uncomfortable to say no. As empowered as we feel when we say yes to things, we often feel just as guilty when we say no. The evil one uses this against us in ways that may seem honorable in our intentions. He capitalizes on our desire to help people and twists it, turning us into people who want to do a lot of good things but sometimes share little love. As a result, we have calendars filled with volunteer opportunities, charity work, meetings and Bible studies that seem like we are making good use of our time. However, they don’t serve what the Lord is asking us. Instead we must (in the words of Saint Teresa of Calcutta) “do small things with great love.”

When you say no, a powerful thing happens. You step aside and invite someone else to live out their call. You embrace what you’ve been asked to do and you do it well.

We are each asked to do different things.

In chapter 10 of Matthew’s Gospel, Jesus tells His  disciples: “Whatever town or village you enter, look for a worthy person in it, and stay there until you leave. As you enter a house, wish it peace. If the house is worthy, let your peace come upon it; if not, let your peace return to you.” (Mt 10: 11-13).

This strikes me every time I read it because sometimes I feel like I’m not doing enough. There are people out there who have said yes to amazing calls to serve in impoverished areas or teach at low income schools or tend to the sick in hospitals or nursing homes. I work in “Corporate America” as a writer; what real change am I making? But when I read this scripture passage, I remember that the worthy persons Jesus is referring to had a very important job too: their yes was to invite strangers into their homes and have a place for them to sleep and food for them to eat. They furthered the mission of Jesus by allowing the disciples on foot to rest and recharge.

We all have a specific and individual call that God wrote on our hearts before we were even conceived. As we prepare to celebrate Christ’s birth this Christmas, let us ask for the courage and openness of Mary to say yes when we hear God’s call. And when we do, He will rejoice because in accepting our call, others will have the freedom to accept theirs as well.

 Jill Simons is an artist, designer and blogger at Pink Salt Riot. As a wife and mother, her Catholic faith has always been her foundation. She is passionate about combining words and art as a way to evangelize. She is grateful to God for inspiring her to use her creative talents in ministry.

“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.”

G. K. Chesterton

Thanksgiving is right around the corner! This is a beautiful day designated to open our hearts up to God in joy, gratitude and praise. All that we have, comes from Him. He is the reason we live and move. What a cause to rejoice!

This Thanksgiving, let us enter into the mystery of God’s generosity, through imitating Him and praising Him in wonder. Here are three ways that we can enter into the mystery of God’s generosity through showing Him gratitude this Thanksgiving! When we show God gratitude we acknowledge all the good He has done for us and we are filled with joy, happiness, and wonder.

1. Begin Your Day In Prayer

Praying a thirty-second morning offering, giving God our joys, works, sufferings, and prayers will transform our entire day. Having specific prayer times throughout the day, helps center our minds and hearts on God and His goodness. Through prayer, we start to see everything as a gift from Him! When we find ourselves straying from the good, or if we find ourselves feeling overwhelmed, prayer is a great way to center us and bring us into God’s presence and be reminded of the good He has for us. Prayer gives our day order, focus, and purpose and is the perfect way to thank God for His goodness and generosity not only on Thanksgiving, but every day!

2. Be Present – Spend Quality Time With Others

We are bombarded with distractions: shopping, entertainment, social media feeds, messages from friends, and thoughts of what “everyone else” is doing. This takes our focus off of God and the people we interact with, and puts it on things: things that encourage instant gratification. This Thanksgiving, be present. Take time to listen. Truly connect with the people that you are with. Giving others your undivided attention and your quality time shows your respect for the dignity of the person. Quality time is a means to love others and to love ourselves, and shows God we are grateful for the gift of the people He has placed in our lives.

3. Share How God Is Working In Your Life

I remember hearing a podcast a few years ago around the holidays and the host said, “Remember not to bring up politics or religion this holiday season!” Hearing this saddened my heart. I know both topics bring up passionate feelings, but I do believe we are meant to witness to the power and love of God that we are experiencing in our life. Do not be afraid to share with your family and friends the miracles God is working in your life! Be a beacon of mercy for your family members around the Thanksgiving table, imitating Christ’s Divine Mercy. The fruit of your witness and love may be instantaneous in someone’s life or it may come to fruition years later, yet words that glorify God always bear good fruit.

We can show our gratitude to God this Thanksgiving through extending His love and mercy to all those we encounter.  Starting our day with prayer, being more present to others and being a witness of God’s love and sharing in the beauty of that love, will point others to Him. These small ways of redirecting our purpose to God, will not only change our hearts, but will transform the lives of everyone around us!

 Claire Couche is a wife, mother, blogger, and beekeeper. Claire graduated from Franciscan University of Steubenville where she studied history and theology. She later received her B.S.N. and worked as an oncology nurse. Combining her love of the faith, the medical field, and ethical fashion, Claire is the creator of Moscati Scrubs, an ethical medical scrubs company inspired by the life and miracles of Saint Giuseppe Moscati. You can learn more Claire here and about Moscati Scrubs here.

It’s that time of year when we pull out the Halloween decorations, carve some pumpkins, go apple picking, and pick out over-priced costumes. It’s a dream come true for those of us who love to create our own costumes and act like our favorite characters from various books, movies, or tv shows.

When I was in high school, I loved dressing up for Halloween. One year I dressed up like Frodo Baggins from The Lord of the Rings, and when I was a Senior, I decided to dress up like a mime. I did not speak at all and only made gestures through my hands and expressions. It was quite hysterical trying to “communicate” with my friends and teachers! In fact, when I tried miming out the answer to the math problem in my calculus class, my teacher squirted me with water as punishment… it was so worth it!!

For those of us who are Catholic, Halloween has become a controversial topic for the faithful. Many believe that it has pagan origins and feel that it is not appropriate for Catholics to celebrate. Others feel that it’s an evil holiday and want nothing to do with it. I can understand why many people would feel this way! Who in their right minds would want to participate in festivities that beckon evil spirits or make us stray away from God?

What many people do not realize is that

Halloween is deeply rooted in the Catholic Faith.

Since the fourth century, the honoring of all Christians who died for their faith was celebrated on May 13^th. Overtime, the faithful celebrated the “Feast of All Saints” to commemorate all the Holy men and women in Heaven (not just the martyrs). By the 9^th century, Pope Gregory IV transferred the feast to November 1^st so that “All Hallows’ Eve” could fall as its vigil on October 31^st. Some historians believe that Pope Gregory did this to “sanctify” the Celtic holiday of Samhain which was all about scaring away ghosts and spirits. This ingenious move encouraged pagans to delve deeper into the richness of Christianity. In turn, many hearts were converted to the Catholic faith.

For those of you who are still not convinced about Halloween,you must remember that

Jesus overcame death by His resurrection and that evil will never prevail because of the incredible love God has for us.

If we refrain from participating in any evil activity or practices, we have nothing to worry about.

As you participate in your annual Halloween traditions, take some time to think about the Saints who have gone before you! They are praying for you as you continue striving for holiness. Maybe one day, you will be doing the same for future trick-or-treaters! 😉

Carolina Soares is the Event Coordinator of Array of Hope. She received a Master’s Degree in Theology at Immaculate Conception Seminary School of Theology at Seton Hall University.  She is a Portuguese geek who is very passionate about her Catholic faith and family! She looks up to Saint Teresa of Calcutta for inspiration and thinks C.S. Lewis is pretty amazing!

God never fails to answer our prayers. Sometimes it takes a long time and we don’t always see the fruits, and then sometimes God answers us immediately.

Jesus helps us in the most mysterious ways, but it is always in His perfect timing.

For me, He sends horrible natural disasters. Yes, you read that correctly. There have been multiple instances where storms have answered my prayers (God is so extra). Allow me to share with you an example of what I mean. 

It was a Tuesday. The sun was shining, it was 78 degrees outside, and on the outside, everything was good. On the inside, I was a mess.

For the previous three weeks, I had been struggling with getting my college assignments completed. Working full time and attending online college can be quite a juggle. Along with that, I was directing a dinner theater and the performance was that Friday. To top it all off, I had looming deadlines for getting together the biggest event of my little life; my vendor’s table at BookCon.

With all this and more on my mind, I was very overwhelmed. I needed to complete these 3 important projects before the week was over otherwise my grades would plummet. That morning, I said the quick prayer that had been my mantra for the past month: “Please, God, help me get these projects done.” As you can see, the prayer was simple, but God is always listening.

The old saying “Be careful what you wish for; lest you get it” has never been truer to me. 

At 4:15 pm that day, I got a call from my sister. She was hysterical crying and begged for me not to drive home yet from work. The winds were whipping, trees came crashing down, and the power was out. Tornadoes were raging through my hometown.  After receiving multiple concerned calls from family, I decided to stay put. 5:00pm crept up on me and so did the storm. My coworkers had all left to beat it and I stayed behind to wait it out.

During that time, I wasn’t sure what to do. I wanted to get home but was advised to stay put. So, with the power still on at the office, I did the only thing I could do – Homework. I was at there for 3 hours before it was safe for me to drive home. In that time, I worked on my biggest research assignment. Once I was finished, the roads were cleared and I safely drove home to my powerless, dark town. 

You’re probably thinking, That’s great… she got her homework done. Yipee. But that sounds like a terrible storm! Why would she consider this an answer to her prayers?!

Trust me. That storm was dreadful and difficult for most people (my family included). However, the moral of this story is twofold: God is listening and He makes good out of everything. 

God is always listening.

Throughout my difficult scheduled moments, God has always made it possible for me to get things done. To some people, this may seem like a small prayer but that makes it even more profound. God listens to our purest and simplest prayers. If He is listening to prayers like mine, imagine what He’s thinking when we have larger requests. Whatever you’re praying for, just have patience. Things happen in God’s time and according to His plan (which is always better).

God makes good out of everything.

Was the storm horrible? Absolutely! I pray that we never get another storm like that here again. Despite the destruction, God made good out of all of it. Not only for me, but for others in my town. The storm brought our community together as we did our best to help each other in this crisis. It gave veteran soldiers work for a few days while they stood in the rain directing traffic beneath powered-down lights. It also gave everyone a greater appreciation for what we have. We realized that in an instant so much could be lost.

As you can see first hand, God is always working in our lives. I find it amazing how God cares so much about me particularly and my simple needs. This is the same for you. God is listening to you. He cares about you so much and loves you with such detail. He would move mountains (and send storms) for you. When we experience hardships and difficulties, He always makes good out of it. With all these things, we just have to trust, be patient, and let Him work in our lives.

Sara Francis is a young Catholic author and media communicator. She is a member of the Array of Hope team and is the author of  the YA sci-fi trilogy The Terra Testimonies. She strives to bring Christ’s message to teens through everything she does. If she’s not writing, she’s making music or art. Sara also loves time with friends, French fries, martial arts, and making people smile. To check out her books, visit her author site: www.sara-francis.com. To see her work as a media communicator and more, visit her portfolio: saraannraciti.weebly.com   

I think we can all agree that traffic usually ends up being one thing: Frustrating.  Let’s be honest— it slows us down and prevents us from getting to where we need to go. Not to mention, we are surrounded by people who are also frustrated. It is even worse when we are trying to come home after a long day at work and find ourselves stuck in traffic. 

I would like to share with you 3 reasons why I actually have grown to appreciate traffic.  Please keep in mind that I am writing this from one of the biggest traffic hubs in the country— Los Angeles.  

1. It Forces us to Slow Down

The ugly reality of traffic is that it forces us to slow down.  If we don’t, we end up in a bad situation such as an accident, fender bender, or ticket. With this reality in mind, I feel that we are placed into a unique mental state of slowed down attentiveness.  (Disclaimer: I am not encouraging you to to take your focus off of the road).  However, while we are in this “slowed down attentiveness” we can become more and more aware of what the Lord is saying to us.  (And yes, this would require us to turn off the radio.)

2. Patience

Let’s be honest, we can all use a bit of improvement when it comes to being more patient. Patience opens us up to be disposed to the gifts of the Holy Spirit, and it unites the soul to a virtuous life.  

Aristotle once said: 

Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.

The fruit of the spiritual life is the sweet love of the Lord that permeates within our lives when we slow down, set our schedules aside and enter patiently into the Lord’s time. This is the sweetness that comes from living the spiritual life.  We can only fully taste the sweetness  when we move past the bitterness into the sweetness and beauty.  

3: We Are all on a Journey to Heaven

We are all on a journey. Whether it is on the interstate, or a back road, or even a journey in our spiritual life, we are all trying to get somewhere. We are all sinners trying to become Saints, journeying towards our eternal home, which is Heaven.  As I sit in traffic, I am reminded of that beautiful reality. 

So, the next time you find yourself stuck in traffic, remember, to slow down, be patient and remember you are never alone on this journey.  

Enter by the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is easy, that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many.  For the gate is narrow and the way is hard, that leads to life, and those who find it are few. 

Matthew 7:13

Robert Batch holds a degree in Communications with a Minor in Theology from Franciscan University of Steubenville, and is currently pursuing a M.A. in Theology online through Franciscan.  He has a passion for speaking, lecturing, and teaching about the faith.  He currently resides in Southern California with his wife Amanda. 

After braving the aisles of my local discount store and battling eight year olds and parents alike for sale priced highlighters and wide ruled notebooks, I can personally attest to the stress caused by back-to-school shopping. Stores certainly know how to hook the children and raise the stress levels of parents by placing the more expensive items at child’s eye level and the more “practical” items above their heads. Many parents were particularly annoyed by their children’s demands for the overpriced “Paw Patrol” pencils in comparison to the less fancy ones or complaining that the standard colored notebooks looked too “boring.” I, myself, passed over a $5 gold glitter notebook in favor of the 50¢ sale purple notebook of equal size. In the midst of all of the shopping lists and other back-to-school preparations, how can parents ensure that their families are growing closer to God, not just closer to high school graduation?

In my ministry with families, I frequently recommend that parents implement regular family rituals such as a monthly confession for the family followed by ice cream out or a Saturday night Mass followed by pizza. Around the dinner table, families can share their daily “highs” and “lows” with one another and delve deeper into what is going on in their lives. This provides parents and children an opportunity to share their thoughts while highlighting their daily trials and blessings.

Consistency is the key when it comes to helping your family to connect to God more regularly.

Whatever you choose to do as a family, you have to keep at it! It will eventually become a normal part of your family’s culture. Teachers apply the same concept in their classroom through procedures and rules. In the beginning, it can be a bit bumpy and discouraging, but if you are consistent, it will become second nature for everyone. Establishing a family spiritual practice will be worth the effort, and it will become a normal ritual for you and your children.

Here are some suggestions of family spiritual practices you could adopt this upcoming school year:

• Read Scripture – Pick a time during the week to read Scripture together as a family. Some families like to read and discuss the upcoming Sunday Gospel.
• Visit a Church – Make a brief visit to a local church or shrine during the week to encourage your children to have a love for the Eucharist.
• Family Rosary – Pray the Rosary as a family. Older children can lead a decade or begin with just a decade each night if the children are young.
• Read about the Saints – Get your family together and read about the great Saints within the Catholic Church. It is a great opportunity to talk about our Catholic heroes before the children’s bedtime.
• Plan a Family Pilgrimage – Plan a special day with your family and visit a shrine or special Church. Pack a picnic lunch (or stop by your favorite family restaurant), pray for everyone’s special intentions (have the children write them down to bring and leave at the shrine), and teach your children about the Saints whose images you encounter at the holy place. The location doesn’t have to be far, and your children will appreciate it.
• Daddy–Daughter Dates/ Mother–Son Outings – Parents should spend quality with their children. This will do wonders for their self-esteem and give them a chance to bond. Girls’ relationships with their fathers has a big impact upon their image of God as teenagers. You can do something similar with Mother-son outings. This works for single parents too!
• Build a Family Shrine – Pick a mantle over the fireplace or a special corner of a room to be the family shrine. Put images and statues of your family Saints and patrons, photos of family members (living and deceased), and a candle (perhaps a battery operated one that the little ones can use). Gather there from time to time to pray together and encourage the children to do so on their own. Make sure you lead through example and show them the beauty of praying at the family shrine.
• Morning and Bedtime Prayer – Teach your children simple prayers to say upon waking up and going to bed. Pray with them in the evening and teach them how to pray for those in need.

These suggestions are not too complicated! In fact, they can help set a tone of spirituality that gradually becomes a natural part of everyday family life. Through these family practices, children learn what it means to be the people of faith. Even if you did not grow up with any faith traditions, you can always start your own. The traditions you create today will be passed down to future generations. Children have a natural sense of spirituality and love for God! Fostering their Catholic spirituality can bring a richness to your family that is unequalled.

Sister Brittany is a Salesian Sister and the Campus Minister at Mary Help of Christians Academy in North Haledon, NJ. A frequent guest on Relevant Radio, her aim is to help students, readers, and listeners to connect faith with everyday life. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram: @SisterB24

Four years ago I was preparing for my family of three to go to Haiti on a mission trip. I was rallying the fundraising efforts and preparing to lead our missions team. God was moving in my heart. He was breaking down walls and rebuilding others that had been previously destroyed or damaged. God was doing big things in my life, and I knew that. I always trusted in Him.

I had decided to put my notice in at work because I was ready to be a stay-at-home momma. I loved working in youth ministry, but it was incredibly clear to me that God was calling my heart to a different path. You see, my sweet little two and a half year old was the bomb. He was such a little slice of Heaven and I felt deep within my soul that I was meant to be a full time mom.

Before my husband and I got married, I remember having conversations with people about Natural Family Planning, especially while teaching Theology of the Body to the teens I worked with. Most of the time, a joke would come up about how we would have ten children and be driving a bus. Well, we were married, and sure enough, four months later that little stick had two pink lines, y’all. But, what I was not prepared for, while trying to conceive a second child, was the reality of infertility. I had not truly opened my heart to the scriptures that showed how God would open and close wombs. I had not considered He would ever close my womb, until now.

I began reading my Bible with new experiences shaping my view and the Living Word provoked new inspiration, encouragement and comfort in my weary heart.

I began thinking that maybe we were supposed to be a missionary family, called to foster or adopt, or just bloom right where we were planted. I was not sure, so I asked God to make His will clear to us during this mission trip to Haiti. I hoped that God would reveal if that was where He wanted our little family to serve, or somewhere similar. Even if He chose not to reveal a single thing, I was determined to find joy and purpose in my daily life.

And you know what? I did. I was completely at peace with having one child, instead of the bus full I had thought of for so long. I was glad that my husband and I were at peace with the joy found in our little home. I was far from perfect, but looking back, I did experience true joy in this little desert God had led me to. I clinged to Him in my moments of doubt and my faith grew so much. My whole perspective as a woman, sister, friend, daughter, and human changed.

This time in my life taught me about being tender to others and about the inner struggles people face in the silence of their homes or hearts.

It taught me to love in new ways and release any judgement I may have. It taught me to embrace silence and to trust, unceasingly.

The year I spent with a closed womb, while begging God to fill it, has forever changed me. Tears come to my eyes as I write this, because I am so incredibly grateful for this season of my life and look back to it often. My heart was stretched in ways I did not think possible and I am reminded of the steadfast love of Jesus.

God is so good!

Now our family has gone on to welcome not only a second, but also a third child into our home. I know how incredibly fortunate we are to have even one child, let alone three.

So today, I will trust. When I cannot seem to find the courage to lay down whatever struggle I am facing at the foot of the Cross, I will look back on this time and remember how God changed my heart and plans for the better. I will use this time and the fruits that came from it to remind myself to let go and allow God to run the show! He made all my creativity, so of course, I should trust He has more creative and perfect answers to whatever I am dealing with.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

Emily Ripperger is a former youth minister turned stay-at-home Mom of three little blessings. She is passionate about laughter, coffee, family, and the Church. You can read more at www.therootedmom.com and instagram is the best platform to find her on, www.instagram.com/therootedmom

Yeah, the title says it all. Okay, so a boyfriend/girlfriend discerning a religious vocation might not happen to all of us, but it does happen. And, go figure, it happened to me. My boyfriend wonders if he is called to the Priesthood.

Just to catch you up: My boyfriend (I’ll call him Alexander) and I had been friends for over ten years. As kids, we were part of the same homeschool group, hung out every Friday, went to teen groups together, etc. We are both deeply rooted in our faith and want nothing more than to serve God and fulfill His will. 

Over time, I started getting hints that Alexander had developed deeper feelings for me and over time the feelings became mutual, but we never told each other. We remained close friends, talking practically every day, and our families began to hang out more than ever. One night, we we decided to talk about it. After finally confessing, we decided to go on a date and soon after a relationship developed. 

Months into our relationship, I asked Alexander to join me for a daily Mass that I had to sing at. He agreed, and we drove there together, happy and having a good time. When we got to the church, I realized I had to sit separately from him because I had to sing with the other choir members. Not a big deal, I sat up front while he sat a few rows behind me.

Once we got to the sign of peace, I turned to wave to him. When I saw him, there was a look on his face that just didn’t sit right with me. It was solemn, filled with distress and sadness.  I wasn’t sure why but I got a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. 

Something wasn’t right.

Mass had ended and it was time to leave. Normally, I would attend the social gathering with the other young adults afterwards but something was bothering Alexander so we left. The first half of the car ride, we sat in silence. I tried to spark conversation as before, but he wasn’t as chatty. He tried to act like nothing was wrong but I could see it in his eyes and hear it in the tone of his voice. Some thing was up. Not wanting me to worry, he brushed it off and pretended like it never happened. 

The next day, Alexander and I were going on a date that would be the last time I would see him for a month. He was leaving for vacation that weekend and once he returned I would be leaving for mine. That night, he was happy, smiley, and we had a great time. However, in the back of my mind I couldn’t help but wonder what was bothering him the previous day. 

As the night came to a close, I mustered up the courage to ask him what was wrong. With a sigh, he looked me in the eyes and whispered,

“What if God is calling me to be a Priest?” 

Part of me knew this was what he was going to say. I knew he had studied in the seminary for two years in high school, but I thought he discerned that was not what God wanted for him. It took me a moment to take this in, but I knew how to respond. “Well,” I said, my voice cracking, “if that’s God’s will, I won’t keep you from it.” I only want what God wants for Alexander, even if that means letting him go. 

After that, Alexander left for his vacation. Our time apart actually gave us the space we needed to discern and think. We promised we would continue to pray for each other and our vocations and we began to be more open about faith and feelings. Ever since we made ourselves open to God’s will for both of us, we actually began to grow closer to each other. It was as if this is what God intended all along. We decided we would continue to love and care for each other chastely and humbly and let God do the rest. 

Of course things were hard for me at first. There would be times I would overthink and get myself worried about things I couldn’t control. But, over time, I realized that this was all part of God’s plan. This had to happen in order for us to grow closer to God and to each other.  

Throughout it all, I learned some valuable lessons that helped us to continue to grow and be open to where God was calling us. Discerning and navigating a relationship is not always easy, but it gives us a great opportunity to build stronger relationships, grow and learn about God, ourselves and our significant other.  

Here are 3 helpful tips that I’ve learned along the way… 

1. PRAY
   Pray, pray, pray! This is always first and foremost. I have been praying for my future spouse every day since I was twelve years old. If you are in a relationship, pray together! Like Jesus said, “Where two or more are gathered in my name, there will I also be” (Matthew 18:20). Prayer is a powerful thing— take advantage of it. Go to Mass together, pray the Rosary, say grace before meals, whatever it is! Make your relationship a prayer. Together, dedicate yourselves to God.
2. BE HONEST
   Don’t keep secrets— unless it’s about a surprise party or something. Sometimes you simply just need to ask them to tell you. Remain open with one another and be honest. Being in a relationship means being present to each other. Don’t be afraid to talk about things! Talk about what’s bothering you, what you’re thinking, whatever it may be. However, if you’re struggling with something and don’t know what to do, talk to a Priest or a knowledgeable friend/family member before approaching the one you’re in a relationship with. Get an outside perspective and some good advice. I spoke to my mom about this particular situation and she helped me see all the good that came out of it. She told me I shouldn’t worry, but rather trust God— which brings us to our last and final tip.
3. TRUST
   Trust each other and most importantly, trust God. If I didn’t, I would be an absolute mess. I would be worried everyday that the relationship we had would soon crumble or that I would be in the way of a beautiful Priestly vocation. Having trust is an important part for any relationship. God has an amazing plan for each and every one of us. We just have to pray for the wisdom to know and understand what it is.  And remember— God only has three answers to our prayers – 

1 – Yes
2 – Not Yet 
3 – I have something better in mind.

So you are all probably wondering what happened with our relationship.  Did my boyfriend become a Priest?  Well, God is still writing our story,  and we do not know what is yet to come. However, Alexander and I are still together and we are happier than ever. Our relationship has blossomed, and we continue to grow closer through our open and honest dialogue. Though we do not know where God is leading us in our relationship, we continue to prayerfully entrust our lives in HIS hands. Our story is not over yet, and we look forward to seeing God’s beautiful plans for us unfold as we approach the next chapter in our life. For now, let’s just say that our future together is looking bright.

Sara Francis is a young Catholic author and media communicator. She is a member of the Array of Hope team and is the author of  the YA sci-fi trilogy The Terra Testimonies. She strives to bring Christ’s message to teens through everything she does. If she’s not writing, she’s making music or art. Sara also loves time with friends, French fries, martial arts, and making people smile. To check out her books, visit her author site: www.sara-francis.com. To see her work as a media communicator and more, visit her portfolio: saraannraciti.weebly.com   

The conversation about modesty tends to rear it’s head in summer time. Because you know what summertime means in our culture?

Bikinis. They are everywhere.

As a married woman, and a mom of a daughter and two sons, I notice my surroundings more than I used to, because I see them in light of what my kids are taking in. Which is why I found myself thinking through this concept just a little bit more while at the beach last week.

There was an insightful TED talk going around a few years ago, where former model, Jessica Rey, was sharing her thoughts about wearing bikinis and the evolution of swimwear.

In her video, she cited a famous study in which images of women in bikinis were shown to men. Brain scans revealed that the men’s brains would light up seeing a scantily clad woman in the SAME EXACT area of the brain that would light up when they saw a tool. Seriously. Like, a drill. There was NO emotional reaction or attachment observed in the brain, and researchers were able to conclude that women in bikinis actually caused men to react in a way that the women were simply seen as objects. 

Conclusion: what you wear has a direct impact on how people see you.

Whether or not you like this conclusion, it’s science based. You can argue with the facts, but they’re still the facts. 

Which leads me to my next question, what, then, is the purpose of wearing a bikini? That’s what I want my daughter to consider one day when this question comes up.

Is it because it looks stylish? There are lots of stylish suits with more cover.

Is it to get her stomach nice and tan? Who’s going to be seeing that stomach?

Is it to get attention from the opposite sex? That kind of attention has nothing to do with true affection.

Is it because “I CAN”? Why not choose to assert your rights in ways that actually benefit you and society; in a way that changes and impacts the world?

Is it because “I have a nice body”? Yes, you do! And you should protect that awesome body from people who don’t value it.

It’s important to challenge culture and the perspective we have regarding modesty, because there’s a sad trend going around in which encouraging modesty has been slammed as “body-shaming”. As though covering up our body parts means we’re ashamed of them. “Don’t be ashamed”, says culture. “Flaunt it!”

But shame has no place WHATSOEVER in this conversation. This isn’t about covering up our body because we’re ashamed, it’s about covering up because we’re proud. I want my daughter to know that modesty is not body-shaming, it’s the very opposite – it’s body-VALUING.

You choose modesty because you value your body and realize that anything of value is worth protecting from objectification (and let’s not forget from the UV rays of the sun!) You choose modesty because your body is so valuable it’s not just for anyone.

In fact, as a married woman, I value my body so much that I choose to reserve it for the one I value more than anyone else in this world: my husband. Knowing that he will cherish it both physically AND emotionally. 

In the same way, I want my daughter to value herself and in turn to value her body, because it’s so much more than flesh and bones. I want her to begin grasping that message now, as a little girl. As a teenager. And as a young woman. 

Because anything of value is worth protecting! 

All this to say, we’re saying no to bikinis in this family. Feel free to disagree. But that’s how we’re living our lives over here. Modesty is empowering, and it’s what we expect from both our girls AND our boys. 

Catch the follow up article to see what I mean, because there are so many important pieces to this conversation: “Boys Will Be Boys” Until We Expect Them To Become Men

Debra Fileta is a Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life, and Choosing Marriage: Why It Has To Start With We > Me where she writes candidly about love, sex, dating, relationships, and marriage. You may also recognize her voice from her 200+ articles at Relevant Magazine, Crosswalk.com, and all over the web! She’s the creator of this True Love Dates Blog, reaching millions of people with the message that healthy people make healthy relationships!  Connect with her on Facebook or Twitter or book a session with her today!

Every four years, the World Cup Soccer tournament is held in a different country around the world. Did you know that the World Cup was started by a Catholic? According to the Catholic Herald, a Catholic man named Jules Rimet was inspired by Pope Leo XIII’s encyclical Rerum Novarum to create the World Cup tournament so that there may be peace among nations. He believed that soccer “could propagate understanding and reconciliation between the races of the world,” and he was even nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for his amazing work. Since then nations around the world have come together, set aside their differences, and play soccer for a chance to be “the best” in the world.

Like all the teams participating in the World Cup, we too have an opportunity to participate in a worldwide (and Heavenly) event that brings the faithful from all corners of the world together.

We are invited to participate in the World Cup — of Life!

Every time we go to mass and receive Holy Communion, we see the Priest pull out the ciborium (golden cup or bowl) out of the tabernacle so that the faithful can receive our Lord in the form of the Eucharist. In our Catholic faith, we believe that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist (body, blood, soul, and divinity). What’s even cooler is the fact that when we go to mass and participate in the Liturgy of the Eucharist, we unite ourselves with all of our neighbors from around the world!! Though I live in the United States, I know that I am still receiving the same Lord as my relatives in Portugal. No matter where you go, you will always be participating in this great Heavenly feast with everyone else here on earth.

The Catholic Church draws her life from Christ in the Eucharist, and it provides the faithful a wonderful opportunity to experience firsthand a special union with Christ.

However, we are not only united to Christ through the Eucharist, we are also united with each other as a Church. Since we are part of the Church, we are part of the body of Christ. Since we are all unified into one being, the Church, we are able to answer our calling and reach out to those who need Christ in their lives. Because every single person is a part of Christ’s body, the Church, each individual has a calling to have his or her own share in Christ’s mission. Each time we receive Communion, we renew our mission to help our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ since we are unified with them.

According to Saint John Paul the Great, “The Eucharist is not merely an expression of communion in the Church’s life; it is also a project of solidarity for all of humanity. In the celebration of the Eucharist, the Church constantly renews her awareness of being a “sign and instrument” not only of intimate union with God but also of the unity of the whole human race.” (Apostolic Letter for the Year of the Eucharist, #27)

So next time you are cheering for your favorite team during the World Cup tournament (For me, it will always be for my home country Portugal! Força Portugal!), think about how you are participating in a tournament for your salvation by receiving our Lord in the form of the Eucharist during mass. Not only are we consuming the body of Christ, but we are also participating in a world-wide effort to help our fellow neighbors who are part of the same body! It’s pretty amazing to see how unified we are with one another as we all participate in this great Eucharistic feast on earth.

Carolina Soares is the Event Coordinator of Array of Hope. She received a Master’s Degree in Theology at Immaculate Conception Seminary School of Theology at Seton Hall University.  She is a Portuguese geek who is very passionate about her Catholic faith and family! She looks up to Saint Teresa of Calcutta for inspiration and thinks C.S. Lewis is pretty amazing!